Summary
๐๐ฏ๐จ๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ช๐ด ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฑ๐ข๐ต๐ฉ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฅ๐ข๐ณ๐ฌ ๐ด๐ช๐ฅ๐ฆ, ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ด ๐ฑ๐ฆ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ญ๐ฆ ๐จ๐ช๐ท๐ฆ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ช๐ณ ๐ณ๐ข๐จ๐ฆ, ๐ช๐ต ๐ช๐ฏ๐ง๐ฆ๐ค๐ต๐ด ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ด ๐ข๐ด ๐ธ๐ฆ๐ญ๐ญ, ๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ ๐จ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฃ๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐บ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ช๐ฏ๐ต๐ช๐ฎ๐ข๐ต๐ฆ๐ญ๐บ.
#FirstCoffeeThoughts
In my youth I met a lot of angry people – high school, college, and well into my 30s. It was like any person I met was just really angry about a variety of things and it was usually family or work or themselves. Never anything else. It wasn’t the world or anything like that. It was other people or themselves but especially family. It became very exhausting for me trying to be in friendships or relationships with people who chose anger over peace โฆ it wasn’t healthy.
These same people would ask me how I could have evolved into someone who wasn’t angry all the time and I would explain and they’d just laugh and not take it seriously which was fine but I really couldn’t see myself continuing in any kind of relationship with anyone who essentially was addicted to negativity.
There is no room for anything in such people’s lives and you will never be anything other than an outlet for their anger, mental dysfunction, and emotional dysregulation.
There is a significant difference between people who need support and people who need outlets.
Anger is an addictive emotion and people who thrive on it are absolutely addicts. They stay in the emotion, look for things to perpetuate the emotion, and – the worst part – they believe it’s a positive emotion.
Addicts think that anger is something good, something that makes them stronger, something that helps them feel fearless. They think it bolsters them instead of weakening them.
Being angry at other people, or even yourself, is one of those situations where you have to wonder what the point of it is and what it’s doing for/to you.
Being angry at outside things that you have absolutely no control over and no ability to influence or change is similar where you have to wonder what the point of that is and what it’s doing for/to you.
Anger and stress are the fastest way to destroy your health not just mentally but physically. They are the number one killers.
One of the primary reasons I call angry people addicts is because anger is such a self destructive emotion that – not slowly – eats away at the body and mind and causes permanent damage and it still doesn’t make people think that they need to make a change to any lifestyle that perpetuates things that are going to push them to an early grave. They choose it over peace, they hold onto pain over finding healing. They would rather choose those things over their own health.
That’s addiction.
The other thing about perpetually angry people, they suck the life and energy out of others in order to sustain themselves and their addiction to negativity and pain.
They use people to continue to feel angry or to replenish their need for anger. Picking fights, creating arguments, or just siphoning bits and pieces off of others to get their little fixes of confrontation.
They’re dangerous people who only care about themselves and getting what they need for mock strength. They are toxic.
Being angry about unchangeable situations means you’re also unwilling to change and that is very telling.
You can’t change other people and you can’t change the world but you can change yourself … but most people don’t want to. It’s not even a “can’t” situation, it’s a “won’t” situation because they’re too addicted to how anger and negativity makes them feel.
Self destructive people can never be in healthy relationships with others considering what they willingly do to themselves.
Every habit and capability is confirmed and grows in its corresponding actions, walking by walking, and running by running . . . therefore, if you want to do something make a habit of it, if you donโt want to do that, donโt, but make a habit of something else instead. The same principle is at work in our state of mind. When you get angry, youโve not only experienced that evil, but youโve also reinforced a bad habit, adding fuel to the fire.
Surely every man will want to restrain any impulse towards anger when he realizes that it begins by inflicting harm, firstly, on himself! In the case of those who give full rein to anger and consider it a proof of strength, who think the opportunity for revenge belongs among the great blessings of great fortune, do you not, then, want me to point out to them that a man who is the prisoner of his own anger, so far from being powerful, cannot even be called free?
โฆ we adopt our habits from our associates, and, as certain bodily diseases spread to others from contact, so the mind passes on its faults to those nearest. The same principle is true of the virtues, but to opposite effect, namely that they exert a good influence on all they are in contact with; no suitable location or more healthy climate benefits an invalid as much as association with better company benefits a mind that lacks strength.
Anger is the path to the dark side, and as people give in to their rage, it infects others as well, both globally and intimately. It is better to calm down, speak thoughtfully, and soothe others than spread the virus of anger.
Anger is viral and self-perpetuating and people who house it within themselves, spread it to others, and aid in it continuing to destroy lives are willingly and knowingly bringing ruin to the world on a regular basis.
Do better. Be better.
